Depression. It's a lying bitch.
It tells you that people think poorly of you. It tells you that people don't like you. It tries to tell you that people said really negative things about you, but really their words were more neutral.
(Oh, except when people really do say mean things to you. I've had a few a-holes go off on me because their life wasn't perfect recently, and because I couldn't give them the answer they wanted, just the answer that was a reality. Those people said mean things to me, and I was able to let that roll a little more smoothly off my back. It's apparently when I read between the lines to find something mean that's not truly there. Those are the things my brain can't let go of.)
I just don't really want it to get worse again, so I'm back to getting some help. I don't like being here.
Here: that place where you don't want to do anything, go anywhere, answer the phone, get dressed, etc.
Right now I feel...
angry
frustrated
anxious
lazy
disconnected
unfocused
annoyed
so tired
Anyway, wish me luck feeling like me again.
